Identity Perception Through Online Profiles

How do we convey our identities through social media? What are some of the implications of this?

There are many ways in which teens present themselves online. It used to be that users made anonymous profiles to portray themselves online, with the popularity of social media, such as Facebook and Instagram, there has been a shift to presenting one’s true identity (Herring and Kapidzic, p.4). This can be hard to do when you are a teenager trying to figure out who your true self is.

Because of this, it is easy for young social media users like teens to fall into seeking validation of who they are and who they present themselves to be to their friends and even strangers (Ratner, 2018). This approval from others is something that can result in some problems for young people. Instead of being able to discover who they are solely in the real world, like the generations that came before them, digital natives are forced to find themselves both online and in the real world (Herring and Kapidzic). Because they are seen by both their peers and strangers online, whom they are trying to seek confirmation that they fit in, it is easy for them to fall into the trap of trying to appear perfect online. By doing this, it is easy for their imperfections to seem much more visible and important in the real world. This conflict between their two worlds can often make teens feel as though there is conflict within themselves and their identity as well.

For teenagers it is hard to differentiate between the identity they created for themselves online and the one they have in the real world (Johnson, 2014). So, if they strive for perfection online, they likely put pressure on themselves to be perceived–and be–perfect in the real world as well. This can cause many problems for them, even affecting their mental health, which I will talk about in another post here. Trying to seek approval of others in the real world is hard enough, but in the virtual world it can be even harder because they are not only seeking approval from their friends and acquaintances, they are also seen and judged by strangers. These strangers–and even peers–can feel empowered to say whatever comes to mind and criticize anyone at any time because they don’t feel like there are any consequences to their actions in the virtual world, but they can have monumental consequences in the real world for the people on the other end of their criticisms.

It is well known that young people can often lack impulse control and are susceptible to peer pressure (Johnson, 2014). It is even easier for them to fall into these habits online, where it seems like what they do is not really real or important. It is much easier to criticize and harass someone online when you cannot see that person than it is to do in person–although bullying offline does happen as well. With online bullying–cyberbullying–it seems inescapable by the victim and much too easy to keep going for the aggressor because they can stay connected to each other even in the confines of their own homes. For many online aggressors, and those who participate a bystander, by not standing up for one another, they feel as though they have to call out someone else for being imperfect and not fitting in, so they are not called out for the same thing. With the virtual world, there is no deterrent. There is no time to stop and think about what you are going to say or how your actions may affect someone else. When you feel something, you type it and hit send. That ability to react instantaneously is something that can get teens into a lot of trouble when it comes to their actions online.

Young people present themselves online almost as though they are a company branding a product. Actually, a whole industry of social media content creators and influencers has been created because of this ability to brand oneself online. Instead of a celebrity endorsing a product, many of these influencers have taken over this role because their followers trust them, connect with them. Influencers create a following by being relatable. They are regular people, seemingly different from celebrities. I think that the main difference is that celebrities and celebrity status seem unattainable for most. Influencers are not. Influencers are “just like us” and therefore can be trusted and so can their opinions.

This ability to brand ourselves online can be both helpful and detrimental to anyone, but to young people specifically it can be hard to balance the two worlds and two identities while you are trying to figure out exactly who you are. Once you have a brand and a platform that people approve of, you are kind of stuck being that person. It can be hard to grow into a different person. Teenagers tend to seek approval about who they are from others already, but with the introduction of social media, it can be hard to grow out of that as well. If you are constantly posting and keeping up with a personal “brand”, it is much too easy to keep seeking that approval from others, especially when the majority seems to like who you are based on the persona they see through your branded identity. It can be hard for someone’s online identity to grow as they do as a person. That can cause them to have to continue to juggle the online identity of the perfected version of who they used to be and who they have become.

In recent years, there has been a push towards even more transparency online. Users are told they should be authentic and embrace their flaws, but don’t have too many and don’t be too out of the norm. Personally, I think this move towards authenticity can be–as most things are–a good and bad thing for teenagers. It is important to acknowledge that we all have flaws. The identities that we view online are not always correct. A picture of a happy couple could have been taken in the midst of an argument. Two “best friends” could post a picture together but could really be more "frienemies" than “sisters.” A picture of friends out on a Friday night having the time of their lives could've taken the picture and left because, in reality, it wasn’t any fun (this is actually something that I see quite a bit being a college student). It is important for us all to be able to recognize that what we see, is not necessarily representative of the truth because:

The content we expose ourselves to on the media changes the way we think about ourselves and others. Young people are highly affected by the values embraced by media. In effect, media offers numerous interpretations of what is beautiful, sexy, attractive, and appropriate. Young people are especially vulnerable to these influences (Penn State Applied Social Psycholoy Blog).

With that recognition, I believe that some authenticity online is important. It is important to show that we are not all perfect and that perfection is not real, something all of us seem to know but is hard to believe when all we see online is perfection. Being our authentic, true selves online could potentially help us all balance our two identities better because they could be more similar, merged to some extent.

However, with these steps towards transparency, we have to be cognizant that there is a potential to be too authentic or too transparent. While being who we are and being proud to show that identity is a good thing, the other dangers of anonymity and sense of lack of consequences online is still prevalent, which makes it easy for others to attack us if we give away too much of ourselves. And contrary to the saying we all learned as children “sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me”, words hurt. They cut deep and they “can be as damaging to the mind as physical blows are to the body…[t]he scars from verbal assaults can last for years" (Patricia Evans via an article by Faith Brynie Ph.D.). Letting others–specifically strangers online–into the inner workings of our thoughts and lives can be seriously detrimental to anyone, but especially to young people who are still working to figure out who they are and what their place in the world means.

While social media has the potential to be a scary and intimidating place for teens and parents alike, it can be helpful as well. Through social media teens can find and explore interests that they may not have had access to otherwise. This exploration can help teens to feel like they have a purpose and a community of people with similar interests as they do who understand them. Many teens are able to find communities online that support and encourage their interests. They can learn from these communities as well. Many teens are able to create content and share it with others online about their interests. By doing this, they are able to showcase their creativity with others and gain feedback from this as well (Cruz, 2018). They can get help to make their content better and they can help others create content as well. Social media opens the door for new learning experiences and a sense of community that many teens seek but may not be able to find in the real world.

Because of my own experiences that I talk about in some of my other posts (go check them out if you haven’t already) I know that the internet and social media can be used beneficially. Through this blog, I intend to give parents as well as teens the information and resources that they need to start to understand those upsides and downsides of social media. While my opinions and facts on this blog are based on and from are based on research, I encourage all of you to check them out and find some additional research for yourself. This is just a starting point. The more information and research you have for yourself, the more you are able to make informed decisions for yourself and your children.

*Digital Natives: "Teenagers – young people between the ages of 13 and 19...who were born and raised in the age of computers and online communication, today’s teens share self-created content, post their opinions, and link to other content online more than any other demographic group" (Herring and Kapidzic, p.1)